It was the infamous negro-american author Robert Beck who wrote, "Bitch, if I shit in your face you better like it and open wide." This quote played on repeat in Josh's head when he recieved the much cherished Milton Award for his advancements in letting people walk all over him while he made sure that their feet were comfortable. Durin his speech, the audience pissed on him while he performed a rousing rendition of "Singing in the Rain."

At the age of 15 or 16 Josh had his colon removed because shitting blood into his shorts twenty times a day grew tiresome. "I don't know, Doc, I guess it just lost some of it's magic somewhere along the way," Josh said while his gastrointerologist maneuvered a snake light with a camera and air compressor attachment through his guts via his rectum.

During his "sick period" Josh ballooned to 275 pounds. The panic attacks he had in his childhood came back and still haunt him. He was diagnosed with both dysthymia and OCD and no longer takes the medication prescribed for it because it made him feel a different kind of numb than he is used to.

Josh spent 72 straight hours in bed once, afraid to risk tripping and dying before he was "spiritually whole".

His goal is to become famous and then disenchanted with what he thought to be his lifelong dream, at which point he will finally confirm what he suspected all along: That we were given paradise by our Creator, God, and we fucked it all up because we are smarter than everybody else, especially our parents, and now we live in hell and are owed absolutely nothing.

On the brighter side, he does not drive, so he spends less money on gas than you do.

His passions are music, art, entertainment, religion, spirituality, what have you, paranormality including ghosts, UFOs, parapsychology, a truly helpful government, etc., human relationships and reading.

Josh is also an empath and keeps to himself in his piss-poor excuse for a compound and will most likely not answer his door or answer his phone. He is perpetually busy with other people's bullshit and values his "thinking and writing" time.

Josh hired me to be his official biographer ten years ago and has not attended one "creative meeting". I still long to get a hold of him. If anyone can help me out, please contact the webmaster. I also need him to sign the post-dated check he gave me from First Interstate Bank.

Smoke 'em if you got 'em,

Steve Starr